Toddler Fashion Drama – Jack Style

File this one under TODDLERS ARE CRAZY.

If there is something Jack loves more than trucks, buses, trains, and fire trucks, I have yet to find it. Does an object have wheels? Well hold on tight, cause it’s his new best friend, now hand it over.

His love of all things vehicular had led to me buying an assortment of fire truck embellished PJs (broom broom PJs in Jack speak), but beyond that I hadn’t realized how deep this need for wheels was. Until our last trip through H&M.

Two weeks ago I’m merrily pushing the stroller through the baby section looking for a winter hat when I hear a shriek of excitement and see Jack make a lunge for a rack of rompers. Rompers covered in cars, trucks, buses, and broom brooms. By now he’s pulled half the rack into the stroller. Crap. But wait! They’re on sale! FOR THREE DOLLARS. Phew. You can totally have one.

But wait, it only comes in teeny baby sizes! His tears start flowing as I explain there’s not one his size. Crap. I grab the smallest one and say it’s for Teddy Bear. “Noooo!”

Crap.

I try pointing out every other vehicle festooned garment to no avail. Tears are flowing and I’m clearly the worst mother ever because it has to be THIS romper and no other. Back we go to the preferred garment where I also grab the largest available size and tell myself I’ll make him a pillow or some such crafty thing with it, and thus armed we head to pay.

Moderate meltdown at cash register when it becomes apparent cashier wants to take the romper and do God knows what to it.

Nine blocks later we’re at home and he’s still clutching the romper. I show him how Teddy can wear it and he is thrilled. Phew. I chuck the larger size in the wash thinking I’ll make a little stuffed animal later because truth be told, it is really cute fabric.

Well it turns out the darn thing fits him! Bless you, H&M and your weird sizing. The next day he wears his new favorite garment under overalls and then takes such a hard core nap in it…he wakes up soaked.
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The screaming that ensued when I tried to take it off him??? I’m surprised the neighbors didn’t call CPS.

I did what any mother would do. I took the newborn size off Teddy and told him it was a shirt. He spent the rest of the day looking like this:

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Oh well. At least he wasn’t crying.

And yes, I’m tempted to go buy 10 more just in case. Toddlers are crazy. Their mothers are worse.


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