So the other day I’m taking a shower – Jack is “visiting” me by shoving the shower curtain aside and shouting “HI MAMA!” at the top of his lungs every two minutes. Whatever, everyone knows a mama can’t shower in peace. No news there.

I get out and distract the boy by telling him to pick me out a shirt. As he dumps every t-shirt I own on the floor I grab some panties and a bra and start clothing myself. Suddenly he runs out of the room back to the bathroom and I really don’t think much of it. Maybe he just wants to flush the toilet again. That IS awfully exciting you know.

Nope.

Jack runs back in the bedroom and proudly hands me a panty liner. Then points to my underpants and says, “Mama?” while holding the damn thing out to me. A panty liner. My 22 month old boy just handed me a panty liner.

I’m considering making this into a sign and shellacking it onto the bathroom door. It’s time. For the love of all that is holy, it’s time.